Black Ice, Stupid 911 & Lucky 13

I’ve lived in Pennsylvania all my life so I’m used to cold, snowy winters, even if I don’t like them. I also know how to drive in the snow. I actually learned how during a blizzard in the winter of 1984 on a road called the Death Strip. Now-a-days I avoid snow storms because, as I said, I hate snow. I still know how to drive in the snow, but I find myself a bit jittery now that I’m…um…mature, yeah, that’s the word I’m looking for.

 Well, yesterday when I left for my three minute commute to work, it was raining. I hopped into my Jeep and travelled the same windy road I’ve driven for the past fifteen years. I was chugging along about thirty to thirty-five mph when a car in the opposite direction flashed its lights. I wondered, Why the hell is he flashing me, as I made the bend. After I made the third bend, I received my answer.

 A car was on its roof at the bottom of the hill.

 I hit my brakes.

They caught and my wheels locked BUT I kept sliding and another vehicle was coming in the opposite direction and all I could think was, Why the hell am I floating toward that car?

I needed traction! I turned my steering wheel toward the right shoulder. Well, I got my wheels onto the shoulder BUT I still didn’t slow down. I was headed down the hill toward a twelve inch high slab of concrete. I braced myself for impact.

 CRUNCHETY!

 I hit the concrete but kept sliding! I slide another thirty to forty feet until my Jeep got stuck in snow, leaves and mud. I slammed it in park, grabbed my cell phone and jumped out. Then I almost fell on my ass.

BLACK ICE!

Holy shit! I held onto my Jeep for leverage as I made my way to the side of the road, then I scrambled UP the hill and held onto a small tree, thankful I wore flat boots and not my normal three and a half inch heels, as I dialed 911!

 Guess what I heard? All lines are busy, please hold.

 I yelled, I AM, to a fucking tree!

 Then I hung up. Because seriously, I pay a dollar a month to be placed hold (insert joke here).

 Anyway, after I hung up on the 911 people, I saw more cars sliding down the hill, which was why I had gotten out of my Jeep and run up the hill. I didn’t want to be IN my Jeep in case another car couldn’t stop and hit into me! I watched, almost as if it were in slow motion, as cars slid down the hill. And I was just waiting for the first one to slam into my Jeep. But it stopped! Within a few feet! I was shaking and I could only imagine that the little girl driving that car was probably shaking, too!

 I called my husband. I told him he needed to rescue me but he couldn’t possibly drive TO me, he had to park somewhere and walk. The good news, I was in between our house and my work.

 After about thirty minutes, the Calvary showed up. My husband, son and a guy who works for my husband (who happens to live right on the road in question) walk-skated-slid down the hill to me. Then the salt truck came and distributed some salt which helped melt the ice. It was only then that I could even attempt to back my Jeep up and see if there was any damage.

 We determined, by the tire marks in the snow, that it was my right front tire that hit the concrete drain build-up. So, until I had backed the vehicle up, we didn’t know if the tire was flat. I four-wheeled it backwards and holy crap—NO damage as far as we could see!

 After the fire department had cleared everything away, I was able to drive to work and have the under carriage checked. There isn’t a scratch on my Jeep! I truly have no idea how the hell that happened. When I see my tire marks in the snow, I want to throw up. I must’ve been traveling at just the right speed and hit that concrete thingy at just the right angle. And right about now I’m feeling pretty darn lucky.

See, 13 is a lucky number and this is 2013!

 Update: I read this to my husband and he said that 13 is an unlucky number. However, it’s always been a LUCKY one for ME. I’m pretty sure my luck trumps anything he thinks. I’m just sayin’.